Cynical Quotes

Sometimes you just have to sit back, relax, and let the train wreck itself.

Sometimes you just have to…

Sometimes you got to be smart enough to play stupid.

Sometimes you got to be…

You constantly amaze me... but not in a good way.

You constantly amaze me…

If size doesn’t matter why are there no three inch dildos?

If size doesn’t matter…

Too many idiots, not enough villages.

Too many idiots…

Marriage is just a nice word for adopting a fully grown man who can’t take care of himself.

Marriage is…

Everyone is a sneaker motherfucker these days.

Everyone is…

Don’t drink and drive because there are people who text and drive... and they will hit you and it will be your fault.

Don’t drink and drive…

Sometimes karma is the person they end up with.

Sometimes karma…

Always lead with love. But still master the throat punch.

Always lead with love…