Inappropriate Quotes

When things seem especially rough just ask yourself “did I just shit my pants today?” and if the answer is no, you’re doing alright.

When things seem…

I don’t always act my age, but when I do, I’m bored as fuck.

I don’t always act my age…

I beg your pardon: Polite way of saying "what the fuck did you just say".

I beg your pardon…

You know what’s funny? Lots of shit so lighten the fuck up.

You know what’s funny…

If you keep sucking ass… sooner or later you’re gonna eat shit.

If you keep sucking ass…

The bigger the dick the smaller the penis.

The bigger the dick…

I'm unable to fully relate to someone until I hear say them "Fuck".

I’m unable…

If you fuck up but then unfuck your fuck up and nobody saw the fuckery, did you even fuck up at all?

If you fuck up…

Of all the poop in the world, who decided that bat shit was the craziest?

Of all the poop in the world…

My personality is somewhere between Mother Teresa and Motherfucker.

My personality…