Home     Browse     Tags     Random

Inappropriate Quotes

Blessed are the constipated for they don’t give a shit.

Blessed are the constipated for they don’t give a shit.

Complaining is mouth farting. And like any farting, I don’t mind hearing my own, but I don’t want to hear anyone else’s.

Complaining is mouth farting. And like any farting, I don’t mind hearing my own, but I don’t want to hear anyone else’s.

“As fuck” is my favorite unit of measurement.

“As fuck” is my favorite unit of measurement.

Before sex, you help each other get naked. After sex, you only dress yourself. Moral of the story: in life no one helps you once you’re fucked.

Before sex, you help each other get naked. After sex, you only dress yourself. Moral of the story: in life no one helps you once you’re fucked.

Life is like a dick. Sometimes it's up... Sometimes it's down... But it won't be hard forever.

Life is like a dick. Sometimes it’s up… Sometimes it’s down…But it won’t be hard forever.

Being a dick won’t make yours any bigger.

Being a dick won’t make yours any bigger.

Life is like toilet paper. You’re either on a roll or taking shit from some asshole.

Life is like toilet paper, you’re either on a roll or taking shit from some asshole.

Stress is caused by giving a fuck.

Stress is caused by giving a fuck.

52% of women fake orgasms. 100% of men don’t give a shit.

52% of women fake orgasms. 100% of men don’t give a shit.