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Inappropriate Quotes

Sometimes the first step to forgiveness is realizing that the other person is just a fucking twat waffle and isn't worth your time.

Sometimes the first step…

I am not an asshole. I am a hemorrhoid. I irritate assholes.

I am not an asshole…

Opinions are like farts. Just because you have one inside you, doesn't mean you need to let it out.

Opinions…

Fuck Off Pie: 1 cup of no one cares, a dash of kiss my ass, add some fuck you's, a pinch of blow me. Stare and shove it up your ass.

FUCK OFF PIE…

A lot of us fell in love with someone we should of only fucked once.

A lot of us…

FUCK: The only fucking word that can be put every fuckingwhere and still make fucking sense.

FUCK…

How come when a woman is pregnant everyone rubs her stomach and says congratulations but no one rubs your balls and says good job?

How come…

Life is a bitch. So learn how to fuck it.

Life is a bitch…

Love is cuddling until you fall asleep together... Even though you know he farts in his sleep... All damn night.

Love is cuddling…

WIFE: Washing, Ironing, Fucking, Etc.

WIFE…