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Onward buttercup, there is fuckery to spread.

Onward buttercup…

Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day. Give him a pen and he'll probably draw a penis.

Give a man a fish…

They tell you to do what makes you happy. Then they fucking tell you that you drink too much, eat too much and fucking swear too much. What the fuck, that's the shit that makes me happy.

They tell you to do…

Never fuck with a fucked up fucker that doesn't give a fuck.

Never fuck with…

People often call me an asshole. In my defence, I'm only an asshole to assholes that deserve an asshole to be an asshole to.

People often call me an asshole…

You shouldn't have to change yourself for anyone. The right person will love you for the cunt you are.

You shouldn’t…

If life turns her back on you, grab her ass. - Nelson Rodrigues

If life turns her back on you…

Chances are if it’s tasteless and inappropriate I will think it’s totally hilarious.

Chances are…

Off is a general direction in which I wish you would fuck.

Off is a general direction…

Some people’s third eye is their butthole.

Some people’s third eye…