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Insulting Quotes

Do you know what sexual position produces the ugliest children? Go ask your mother.
If laughter is the best medicine your face must be curing the world.
I guess those enlargement pills are working because you're twice the dick you were yesterday.
ASKHOLE: A person who constantly asks for advice then does the opposite of what you told them.
Think old and you'll be old. Think young and you'll be a delusional old fart.
Scientists say the world is made up of Photons, Neutrons, and Electrons. Hell, they forgot to mention Morons.
Some people are just beautifully wrapped boxes of shit.
Some people make me wonder… How do they fit all that stupid into one head?
Do you ever meet someone and think dumbass, then listen to them and think bloody fucking dumbass?
Bitch please, your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.
Masturbation is the only thing that isn't taxed, regulated, or illegal. That's your "freedom". You're free to go fuck yourself.
I’m not a proctologist but I know an asshole when I see one.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak. – Alan Dundes
How is a woman like a condom? Both spend more time in your wallet than on your dick.
Arguing with idiots is like playing chess with a pigeon. No matter how good you are, the bird is going to shit on the board and strut around like it won anyway.
I suck at apologies, so…unfuck you or whatever.
Mirrors don’t lie. And lucky for you they don’t laugh either.
Before we work on artificial intelligence why don't we do something about natural stupidity? - Steve Polyak
Some people are like clouds. When they disappear, it becomes beautiful day.
God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time. – Robin Williams