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Life Quotes

Life isn’t like a box of chocolates. It’s more like a jar of jalapenos. What you do today, might burn your butt tomorrow. – Larry the Cable Guy

Life…

Life is like diarrhea. No matter how hard you try and stop it, the shit just keeps coming.

Life is like diarrhea…

Life is not a fairy tale. If you lose a shoe at midnight, you’re drunk.

Life is not a fairy tale…

Life is too short to worry about what others say or think about you. So just enjoy life, have fun, and give them something to talk about.

Life is too short…

Thanks to the people that walked in to my life and made it better. And thanks to the ones who walked out and made it amazing.

Thanks to the people…

Life is all about ass. You’re either covering it, laughing it off, kicking it, kissing it, busting it, trying to get a piece of it, behaving like one, or living with one.

Life is all about ass…

Life is like a monkey… It throws shit at you.

Life is like a monkey…

Sometimes life will fuck you and you’ll just have to change positions and find a way to enjoy it.

Sometimes life will fuck you…

Some days my biggest accomplishment is keeping my mouth shut.

Some days…

Life is about saying “FUCK IT” to those who matter, and “FUCK YOU” to those who don’t.

Life is…