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Rude Quotes

For all the women that brag about how many men want them, just remember the cheapest prices attract the most customers.

For all the women…

Don't like me? Cool. I don't wake up every day to impress you.

Don’t like me?…

Do you ever feel the urge to tell someone to shut up even when they aren’t talking?

Do you ever feel…

Don’t try to explain yourself to stupid people. You’re not the jackass whisperer.

Don’t try…

If I wanted to listen to an asshole, I would fart.

If I wanted to listen…

Every day I arrive at work with good intentions and great attitude… Then idiots happen.

Every day I arrive at work…

Stop telling everybody I’m fucking crazy. I love to see the surprises on their faces when they figure it out by themselves.

Stop telling everybody…

Bitch please, your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.

Bitch please…

I’m not good at push ups, pull ups and sit ups. I’m pretty good at fuck ups though.

I’m not good at push ups…

Do you ever meet someone for the first time and want to buy them a toaster for their bathtub?

Do you ever meet someone…