Sarcastic Quotes

Alcohol doesn’t solve any problems, but then again, neither does milk.

Alcohol doesn’t…

A little piece of advice… Don't talk shit if you can't fight.

A little piece of advice…

A FACT OF LIFE: After monday and tuesday, even the calendar says WTF

A FACT OF LIFE…

The best things in life either make you fat, drunk or pregnant.

The best things in life…

Only dead fish go with the flow.

Only dead fish…

A cat looks down upon a man, and a dog looks looks up to a man, but a pig will look a man in the eye and see his equal. – Winston Churchill

A cat looks down…

A wife is like a hand grenade. Remove the ring, and your house is gone.

A wife is like…

71% of our planet is covered by water. 28,9 is covered by fucking idiots.

71% of our planet…

52% of women fake orgasms. 100% of men don’t give a shit.

52% of women…

RULE NUMBER ONE: Fuck what they think.

RULE NUMBER ONE…