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Sarcastic Quotes

Rude, Sarcastic, Funny Quotes & Sayings

Remember to always be yourself. Unless you suck. – Joss Whedon

If you’re talking behind my back than you’re in the perfect position to kiss my ass.

If you’re talking behind my back than you’re in the perfect position to kiss my ass.

I don’t hate you, I'm just not necessarily excited about your existence.

I don’t hate you, I’m just not necessarily excited about your existence.

Think whatever you like of me if it helps you sleep at night. In the end I get to keep my integrity while you feed your own bullshit to stay alive.

Think whatever you like of me if it helps you sleep at night. In the end I get to keep my integrity while you feed your own bullshit to stay alive.

Never get jealous when you see your ex with someone else, because our parents taught us to give our used toys to the less fortunate.

Never get jealous when you see your ex with someone else, because our parents taught us to give our used toys to the less fortunate.

When people suck the life out of you, wouldn’t it be nice if they took some fat too?

When people suck the life out of you, wouldn’t it be nice if they took some fat too?

I'm tough, I'm ambitious, and I know exactly what I want. If that makes me a bitch, okay. - Madonna

I’m tough, I’m ambitious, and I know exactly what I want. If that makes me a bitch, okay. – Madonna

Be happy. It drives people crazy.

Be happy. It drives people crazy.

Life is like sex, you can either lay back and let it screw you, or you can get on top and ride the hell out of it.

Life is like sex, you can either lay back and let it screw you, or you can get on top and ride the hell out of it.

I’d rather be an honest asshole than a well liked liar.

I’d rather be an honest asshole than a well liked liar.