Vulgar Quotes

Don't be a magnet for fucktards and shitwits.
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Don’t make excuses for nasty people. You can’t put a flower in an asshole and call it a vase.
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Blessed are the constipated for they don’t give a shit.
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Friends are like boobs. Some are big, some are small. Some are real and some are fake.
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Complaining is mouth farting. And like any farting, I don’t mind hearing my own, but I don’t want to hear anyone else’s.
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“As fuck” is my favorite unit of measurement.
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Before sex, you help each other get naked. After sex, you only dress yourself. Moral of the story: in life no one helps you once you’re fucked.
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Life is like a dick. Sometimes it's up... Sometimes it's down... But it won't be hard forever.
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God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time. – Robin Williams
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Being a dick won’t make yours any bigger.
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Life is like toilet paper, you’re either on a roll or taking shit from some asshole.
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Stress is caused by giving a fuck.
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Do what the fuck you want. Because in the end people are assholes and will judge you anyway.
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Don't like me? Fuck off. Problem solved.
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BITCHCRAFT: The art of pissing people off while smiling sweetly.
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Some people’s birth certificates should be an apology letters from the condom factory.
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71% of our planet is covered by water. 28,9 is covered by fucking idiots.
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52% of women fake orgasms. 100% of men don’t give a shit.
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