Vulgar

Don't trip over bitches, walk over them.
I am a nice person. Just don't push the asshole button.
I may not be much help in telling you what works. But I sure have fucked up enough to tell you what doesn't.
It's never too late to get your shit together.
I have 3 moods: IDK, IDC, IDGAF.
You think everyone has the same heart as you, and that's what's going to fuck you up.
Every evening when I tell my boss "Have a good night", what I really saying is "Go fuck yourself".
I've learned a lot of great lessons from a few fucked up people.
How many times do I have to say "excuse me" before "get the fuck out of my way" becomes acceptable?
Never try to fuck up someone's life with the lie when yours can be destroyed with the truth.
opinions are like farts, everyone else’s stinks, they are hard to hold in and when you let one go, at least one person will leave the room
Trusting people has made me the asshole I am today.
People who think their shit don't stink haven't pulled their heads out of their asses long enough to smell the difference.
Rude, Sarcastic, Funny Quotes, Thoughts, Sayings
Remember, if you have an issue with me I will never give a flying fuck. My life, my rules. Can’t handle it? Fuck the fuck off.
Let's not make this more complicated than it has to be. If you don't want to be called out on your shit, don't act shitty.
When a male octopus finds a mate, he rips off his penis and throws it at the female so she can inseminate herself, then he grows a new penis. If that isn't the most epic way to tell someone to "go fuck yourself" I don't know what is.
When you try your hardest not to be a fucker, but everyone you deal with is a fucker, so you end up being a bigger fucker just to outfuck the fuckers.
"GO ON", I whisper as I unfold my hands towards the open sky. A single fuck escapes from my finger, soaring gracefully into the cool air. "YOU'RE FREE NOW". My last fuck has gone. I have none left to give.
I hate when people use their zodiac to justify shitty behaviour like "Sorry I can't help it, I'm a Scorpio". No Susan, you're just a bitch.
Some people are like tractors. They're good at spreading shit.
If you have a problem with me, get over it. You'll make yourself miserable waiting for me to give a fuck.
A lot of people lacked that gift: knowing when to fuck off. - Gillian Flynn
Most of the time... when you're crying, nobody notices your tears. Most of the time... when you're worried, nobody feels your pain. Most of the time... when you're happy, nobody sees your smile. But when you fart just one time...
Ambitchious: Striving to be more of a bitch than the average bitch.