Vulgar Quotes

Nothing brings a group of assholes together faster than something that’s none of their fucking business.

Nothing brings a group…

Surprise sex is the best thing to wake up to. Unless you’re in prison.

Surprise sex…

If I was a bird, I know who I’d shit on.

If I was a bird…

Men look at woman’s behind and go “wow! What an ass!” Woman look at man’s face and think the same.

Men look at woman’s behind…

How is a woman like a condom? Both spend more time in your wallet than on your dick.

How is a woman like a condom?…

Sarcasm and orgasm…My two favorite “asms”.

Sarcasm and orgasm…

I’ve found the key to happiness. Stay the hell away from assholes.

I’ve found the key to happiness…

Is “Fuck you” an emotion? Because I feel it all the time.

Is “Fuck you” an emotion?…

It’s okay to be a little fucked up in the head, we all are. It’s only when you are fucked up in the heart that makes you a piece of shit.

It’s okay to be…

You can be a good person with a beautiful spirit and still be able to tell someone to go fuck themselves when needed.

You can be a good person…