Why is life testing me so hard lately? I mean I will survive but damn give me a fucking break.
Life is like sex, you can either lay back and let it screw you, or you can get on top and ride the hell out of it.
When life knocks you down, calmly get back up, smile and very politely say “you hit like a bitch”.
To the people in their twenties who think life sucks, life hasn’t even begun to fuck you yet. Buckle up buttercup!
Assholes are part of our lives. We can’t escape. It is how we deal with them that makes the difference. – Wendy Sellers
Life is too short to wake up in a bad mood. I save mine for when I get to work.
If you don’t go crazy every now and then, how could you know that you’re sane, every now and then. Besides, it’s going crazy, that keeps you sane.
Just got a booty call from life. Apparently it wants to keep fucking me.
If hard times only make you stronger then I should be able to whip Superman’s ass by now.
Sometimes you just need to sit down, blast your favorite music, and not give a fuck about the world for a while.
We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public. – Bryan White
Life is too short to be serious all the time. So, if you can’t laugh at yourself, call me, I’ll laugh at you.
MY LIFE, MY RULES, FUCK OFF!
Some people come into our lives and leave footprints on our hearts, while others come into our lives and make us wanna leave footprints on their face.
Life is so much funnier if you have a dirty mind.
Life is tough, but it’s tougher if you’re stupid.
THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE: 1. You believe in Santa Claus, 2. You don’t believe in Santa Claus, 3. You are Santa Claus, 4. You look like Santa Claus
Life has a tendency of fucking things up when you finally get to be happy.
I’ve been through hell throughout my life. And my ass just smiled the whole time.
Life is going to get hard sometimes, so get the fuck up and get your shit together. You are either an ocean or a puddle, don’t be a puddle. People walk through puddles like they are nothing. Oceans fucking destroy cities.