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Adult

I hate it when TV shows say they contain “adult situations” but then don’t show anyone going to work, paying their bills or cleaning up after their kids.

I hate it when TV shows say…

Crying about a broken heart all day is childish. Get drunk and set shit on fire, like an adult.

Crying about a broken heart…

Adulthood has shown me that you really don't need fun to have alcohol.

Adulthood has shown me…

Pretending to be a functional adult is exhausting.

Pretending to be…

It’s hard to be a mature adult when you’re surrounded by assholes.

It’s hard…

I have to keep reminding myself that I’m an adult and will be charged as one.

I have to…

Once I learn someone hates me, I make sure to go out of my way to piss them off more because that’s what adults do.

Once I learn…

We wanted to be adults so bad. Now look at us. Just fucking look.

We wanted…

Adult females friendships are mostly sending memes and helping diagnose sociopaths in each other’s lives.

Adult females friendships…

Being an adult is easy. It’s like riding a bike, except the bike is on fire. Everything is on fire. And you’re in hell.

Being an adult…