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Awesome

If you’re going to be an asshole be an awesome asshole, because nobody likes a shitty asshole.

If you’re going to be…

If I had sex as much as I get screwed... life would be awesome!

If I had sex…

Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect.

Don’t judge me…

Trust me, when I woke up today, I had no plans to be awesome. But shit happens.

Trust me…

Dear haters, I couldn't help but notice that "Awesome" ends with "Me" and "Ugly" starts with "U".

Dear haters…

If you could read my mind, you’d be either traumatized or turned on. Both if you are awesome.

If you could read my mind…