Coffee

I don’t need an inspirational quote to start the day. Just give me coffee and shut the fuck up.

I don’t need…

I love it when coffee kicks in and I realize what an adorable badass I am goung to be today.

I love it…

Give me coffee to change the things I can and wine to accept those that I cannot.

Give me coffee…

Today I mixed my bitch flakes with some lucky charms and downed it all with a pot of coffee... I’m going to be magically energized super bitch all day!

Today I mixed…

I’m not everyone’s cup of tea… But I drink coffee, so fuck them.

I’m not everyone’s cup of tea…

My body is a filter: coffee comes in, sarcasm comes out.

My body is a filter…

By replacing your morning coffee with green tea, you can lose up to 87% of what little joy you still have left in your life.

By replacing…

I’ll get coffee with you but only because I love coffee.

I’ll get coffee…

Half the day, I wonder if it’s too late for coffee. The other half, I wonder if it’s too early for alcohol.

Half the day…

Coffee fuels my sarcasm. What fuels your stupidity?

Coffee fuels my sarcasm…