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Coffee

I either drink coffee or I say bad words. Just kidding. I do both.

I either…

My morning coffee makes me feel like I got my shit together. I don’t. But it feels like it.

My morning coffee…

Drink coffee! Do stupid things faster and with more energy! - Darynda Jones

Drink coffee!…

I run on caffeine, sarcasm, and inappropriate thoughts.

I run on caffeine…

BEFORE COFFEE…

Before I have coffee, everyone is an asshole. After I have coffee, everyone is still an asshole, but I have coffee.

Before I have coffee…

IF DRINKS COULD TALK: Coffee - You can do this! Wine - You don't have to do this! Tequila - Holy shit! Did you really just do that?!!!

IF DRINKS COULD TALK…

Sometimes in the morning while sipping my coffee, I think about all the people I’m going to piss off today… and I smile.

Sometimes in the morning…