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Day

If your phone battery lasts all day, it’s because no one likes you.

If your phone battery…

Yeah, it's pretty hard not to be completely cynical these days. - David Byrne

Yeah, it’s pretty hard…

Today is the first day of the rest of your life. But so was yesterday, and look how that turned out.

Today…

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? - Steven Wright

24 hours in a day…

Every day is Friday when you’re unemployed.

Every day is Friday…

One day I’m just gonna say fuck it all. And let my demons out to play

One day…

LIVE TODAY LIKE IT IS YOUR LAST DAY! But pay your bills and use a condom just in case it isn’t.

LIVE TODAY…

One day I will start behaving myself.. But not today. (Tomorrow’s not looking good either.)

One day…

Don’t let anyone else ruin your day. It’s YOUR day. Ruin it yourself.

Don’t let anyone…

Sleep well middle finger, you’ve got a big day ahead of you tomorrow.

Sleep well middle finger…