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Dr's say that drinking 8 glasses of water a day helps your skin look younger. My advice: Drink 8 glasses of wine a day an you won't give a damn how old you look.

Dr’s say…

You know you're getting old when you can't walk past a bathroom without thinking "I might as well pee while I'm here".

You know you’re getting old…

I don't think we do get smarter as we get older. I just think we run out of stupid things to do.

I don’t think we do get smarter…

My 4 Moods

MY 4 MOODS…

When I was a kid, I wanted to be older. This shit is not what I expected.

When I was a kid…

Think old and you'll be old. Think young and you'll be a delusional old fart.

Think old and you’ll be old…

Some people are like old TVs. They need to be slapped a few times to get fucking picture.

Some people are like old TVs…

Don’t worry about getting older. You’re still going to do dumb stuff, only slower.

Don’t worry about…

As I have grown older…