Sarcasm

I love sarcasm, it's like punching people in the face, but with words.

I love sarcasm…

I run on caffeine, sarcasm, and inappropriate thoughts.

I run on caffeine…

I am not made of sugar and spice and everything nice. Sarcasm, alcohol, anger issues and carbs is more accurate.

I am not made of sugar…

MY VOCABULARY: 50% swearing, 50% sarcasm.

MY VOCABULARY…

I am fluent in three languages: English, Sarcasm, and Profanity.

I am fluent…

Some people handle stress with yoga, meditation and long walks. I handle it with sarcasm, beer and telling people to fuck off.

Some people handle stress…

Sarcasm is a body’s natural defence against stupidity.

Sarcasm…

I’m afraid if I give up sarcasm, I would have to replace it with murder.

I’m afraid if I give up sarcasm…

I hide behind sarcasm because telling you to go fuck yourself is considered rude in most social situations.

I hide behind sarcasm…

If a woman tells you that you’re right, that’s called sarcasm.

If a woman tells…