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Sleep

I am not always rude and sarcastic. Sometimes I am asleep.

I am not always rude…

Fall in love? No, thank you. I'd much rather fall asleep.

Fall in love?…

A baby can drink a bottle, fall asleep and people say its cute. If I do it, I'm an alcoholic.

A baby can…

Love is cuddling until you fall asleep together... Even though you know he farts in his sleep... All damn night.

Love is cuddling…

What's the difference between a slut and a bitch? A slut will sleep with anyone, a bitch will sleep with anyone but you.

What’s the difference…

How do you sleep knowing people don't like you? ME: Butt ass naked with the fun on high.

How do you sleep…

When people tell me "You're gonna regret that in the morning", I sleep until noon because I am a problem solver.

When people tell me…

I am a person who wants to do a lot of things trapped in a body of a person who wants to sleep a lot.

I am a person…

If you eat well, get good sleep, exercise, and drink plenty of water, you’ll die anyway.

If you eat well…

Can’t fall asleep? Good. Your dreams will never come true anyway.

Can’t fall asleep?…