Sorry

Dear naps, I am sorry I was a jerk to you as a kid.

I’m sorry, I don’t take orders. I barely take suggestions.

Sorry honey, sarcasm falls out of my mouth, just like stupid falls from yours.

Sorry, it’s not my job to blow sunshine up your ass.

I’m sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. I really thought you already knew.

People: Watch your language. Me: Oh fuck, sorry.

I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to push all your buttons. I was just looking for mute.

I’m not sorry for being me, take me as I am, if you don’t like what you see, then piss off.

Sorry for the mean, awful, accurate things I said.

I am sorry, I didn’t realize that you’re an expert on my life and how I should live it. Please continue while I take notes.