Shit

I’m a cynical optimist. The glass is half full of... shit.

I’m a cynical optimist. The glass is half full of… shit.

Grant me the serenity to accept that earth is filled with assholes and fuckery that I cannot change, the courage not to be part of the assholery and fuckery, and the wisdom to know I’m the shit without shitting on others.

Grant me the serenity to accept that earth is filled with assholes and fuckery that I cannot change, the courage not to be part of the assholery and fuckery, and the wisdom to know I’m the shit without shitting on others.

I’m shy at first, but once I’m comfortable with you, get ready for some crazy shit.

I’m shy at first, but once I’m comfortable with you, get ready for some crazy shit.

“Relationship” has 12 letters. So does “Fuck that shit”.

“Relationship” has 12 letters. So does “Fuck that shit”.

Put me in a room with the same people who talk shit about me and watch how friendly they become.

Put me in a room with the same people who talk shit about me and watch how friendly they become.

Whoever is in charge of making sure I don’t do stupid shit is fucking fired.

Whoever is in charge of making sure I don’t do stupid shit is fucking fired.

I must warn you. My inner child is a mean little shit.

I must warn you. My inner child is a mean little shit.

There is a difference between talking shit about a person and talking truth about a shitty person.

There is a difference between talking shit about a person and talking truth about a shitty person.

I googled ‘Who gives a shit?’ My name wasn’t in a search result.

I googled ‘Who gives a shit?’ My name wasn’t in a search result.

If anyone had a not so good day today, do your best to rock that shit tomorrow. Life is too short for two days of bullshit in a row.

If anyone had a not so good day today, do your best to rock that shit tomorrow. Life is too short for two days of bullshit in a row.