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People like to say they are "Real", but they don't say real what. Real shady, real needy, a real piece of shit. Sorry, but I need you to be more specific.

People like to say they are “Real”, but they don’t say real what. Real shady, real needy, a real piece of shit. Sorry, but I need you to be more specific.

GRAMMAR: The difference between knowing your shit and knowing you're shit.

GRAMMAR: The difference between knowing your shit and knowing you’re shit.

They said life is too short to hold grudges. I think life too short to be letting people get away with the same shit.

They said life is too short to hold grudges. I think life too short to be letting people get away with the same shit.

Bitch Please, I'm so freaking fabulous, I pee glitter, shit cupcakes, and fart rainbows.

Bitch Please, I’m so freaking fabulous, I pee glitter, shit cupcakes, and fart rainbows.

Accept yourself. You don't have to prove shit to no one except yourself. - Drake

Accept yourself. You don’t have to prove shit to no one except yourself. – Drake

I would slap you, but shit splatters.

I would slap you, but shit splatters.

I'm so glad I grew up in the '80s and '90s. I did so much stupid shit - and there is no record of it anywhere.

I’m so glad I grew up in the ’80s and ’90s. I did so much stupid shit – and there is no record of it anywhere.

I used to think I had some control over my life. Now, I just pull up a chair and watch the shit show unfold before me.

I used to think I had some control over my life. Now, I just pull up a chair and watch the shit show unfold before me.

MIND: Don't even say shit. Just let it go. It's not worth it. MOUTH: I just find it funny how...

MIND: Don’t even say shit. Just let it go. It’s not worth it. MOUTH: I just find it funny how…

Life begins the moment you realize you don't have to prove shit to anyone.

Life begins the moment you realize you don’t have to prove shit to anyone.