Dirty, Inappropriate, Adult Jokes for People With a Rude Sense of Humor.

Dirty Jokes

For many people the dirty jokes may be more appropriate and enjoyable option. Why do many people like dirty jokes? Because the older we get and the more life experience we have, the more cynical we become. As we get older, we acquire rude sense of humor, and starting to understand inappropriate jokes each year on a deeper level, and taking on a much more adult humor, we begin to prefer funny adult jokes. We begin to find the dirty jokes funnier than clean jokes.

Dirty, Inappropriate, Adult Jokes

A priest is driving his car down a sunny country road…

… when he suddenly sees a nun waiting at a bus stop.

He pulls over and offers her a lift.

The young nun thanks him, puts her luggage in the trunk, and sits down in the passenger seat next to the priest.

As they set off, the nun shifts to fasten her seat belt, and her gown opens slightly to reveal a lovely leg.

The priest glances down and nearly has an accident. After getting the car under control, he can’t help but put his hand on her knee, slowly sliding it up her leg.

The nun looks at him and immediately says, “Father, remember psalm 129.”

The priest gets flustered and apologizes profusely. He forces himself to remove his hand. However, he is unable to remove his eyes from her leg.

Further on while changing gear, he lets his hand slide up her leg again.

The nun once again says, “Father, remember psalm 129.”

Once again the priest apologizes. “Sorry sister, but the flesh is weak.”

Arriving at the convent, the nun gets out, gives him a meaningful glance and goes on her way.

On his arrival at the church, the priest rushes to retrieve a bible and looks up psalm 129.

The psalm said, “Go forth and seek, further up you will find glory.”

Moral of the story: Always be well informed in your job, or you may miss a great opportunity.

A woman goes to prison to visit her husband who has just been sentenced to 40 years in jail.

As soon as she enters the visiting room, she hugs him and exclaims with tears in her eyes: – “Oh! Roger, 40 years, Roger.?”

And the husband replies: “Well, my love, what are you going to do?”

“Oh, Roger …! I spoke to the judge handling your case,”

“And what did he say, my love?”

“He told me that for every time I make love with him, he will reduce your prison sentence by one year …”

“What !!! What a miserable bastard and what did you say to that son of a bitch? “

” Oh, Roger! We’ll talk about it at home, pick up your stuff, let’s go… !!! “

A blind man went to a restaurant.

“Menu sir?” asked the owner.

“I’m blind, just bring me one of your dirty forks. I will smell it and order.”

The confused owner went to the kitchen to retrieve a fork, and returned to the blind man.

The blind man smelt the fork with a deep breath, “Yes I will have the lamb with seasoned potatoes and spring vegetables.”

“Unbelievable!” thought the owner.

The blind man ate and left.

2 weeks later the blind man returned.

The owner, wanting to see how good his smell is, quickly went to the kitchen where his wife Brenda was cooking and said, “Do me a favour and rub this fork over your private part!!” which she did!

He then goes to the man and gives him the fork.

The blind man takes it, puts it to his nose and says, “Oh, interesting! I never knew Brenda worked here!”

At a medical convention, a male doctor and a female doctor start eyeing each other.

The male doctor asks her to dinner and she accepts.

As they sit down at the restaurant, she excuses herself to go and wash her hands.

After dinner, one thing leads to another and they end up in her hotel bedroom.

Just as things get hot, the female doctor interrupts and says she has to go and wash her hands.

Once she comes back they go for it. After the sex session, she gets up and says she is going to wash her hands.

As she comes back the male doctor says, “I bet you are a surgeon”.

She confirms and asks how he knew.

“Easy, you’re always washing your hands.”

She then says, “I bet you’re an anaesthesiologist.”

Male doctor: “Wow, how did you guess?”

Female doctor: “I didn’t feel a thing.”

A woman goes to Italy to attend a 2-week, company training session.

Her husband drives her to the airport and wishes her to have a good trip.

The wife answers: “Thank you honey, what would you like me to bring for you?”

The husband laughs and says: “A gorgeous Italian girl!”

The woman kept quiet and left.

Two weeks later he picks her up in the airport and asks: “So, honey, how was the trip?”

“Very good, thank you.”

“And, what happened to my present?”

“Which present?” She asked.

“The one I asked for – a gorgeous Italian girl!”

“Oh, that” she said, “Well, I did what I could, now we have to wait for nine months to see if it is a girl!”

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