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Toilet

Home is where you trust the toilet seat.

Home is…

Being alone in the toilet is the reminder that you will always be alone when shit happens in your life. Be strong.

Being alone…

Patience is like a toilet roll – the bigger asshole you are dealing with, the quicker it runs out.

Patience…

I don’t care if people talk shit about me. I was raised to flush shit down the toilet, not play with it.

I don’t care…

First rule of house cleaning while listening to power ballads: The toilet brush is never the microphone.

First rule…

People say love is the best feeling. But I think finding a toilet when you are having diarrhea is better.

People say love is the best feeling…