I am currently experiencing life at the speed of 15 WTF’s per hour.
Life
Life is 10% what happens to you, and 90% how much money you have.
I tried to be normal once… worst two minutes of my life.
There are people in life you could never get tired of hitting with a shovel.
When life gives you lemons, freeze them and throw them as hard as you can at the people making your life difficult.
My whole life consists of wondering whether or not to make the sarcastic comment.
Story of my life: I knew better but I did it anyway.
The meaning of life is to find your gift. So good luck with that.
Life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer to the end the faster it goes.
I spend a great deal of my life realizing I should have shut up 15 minutes ago.