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Sarcastic

When I shut my mouth and turn to walk away, it doesn't mean you won. It simply means your stupid ass isn't worth anymore of my time.

I should be ashamed of my behavior. Let's be clear. I'm not, but I should be.

TEQUILA for those times you want to forget stupid shit you've done and do new even stupider shit.

I don't regret burning my bridges. I regret that some people weren't on those bridges when I burnt them.

Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver.

Sometimes you just have to chuck it in the fuck it bucket and move on.

I hate two-faced people. It's so hard to decide which face to slap first.

It’s better to shoot for the stars and miss than to aim at pile of shit and hit.

The stuff you heard about me is a lie, I'm way worse.

"FUCK IT" helped me through a lot of situations.

Some people will talk shit about you to get attention, because if they talk about themselves no one will give a fuck.

Stupid people are like glow sticks. I want to snap them and shake the shit out of them until the light comes on.

I stopped fighting my inner demons. We're on the same side now.

Life has a tendency of fucking things up when you finally get to be happy.

It's better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than open it and remove all doubt. - Mark Twain

Silence is the best reply to a fool.

Men only have 2 emotions: hungry and horny. If you see him without an erection make him a sandwich.

Never make the same mistake twice. There are so many new ones, try a different one each day.

I’ve lost my ability to give a damn. If found, no need to return it. Go ahead and keep it and see if it works for you.

Knowing when to shut the hell up is a gift very few people are born with.

I've been through hell throughout my life. And my ass just smiled the whole time.

I'm sorry... I didn't mean to push all your buttons. I was just looking for mute.

If you don't know my whole story keep your mouth shut. If you know my whole story, you're an accomplice. Keep your mouth shut.

So many people worry about their physical appearance and material possessions and completely disregard their shitty personality.

Fuck excuses, learn to admit when you fuck up.

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