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We all know someone who speaks fluent shit.

We all know someone…

The problem with the world is that the intelligent people are full of doubts, while the stupid ones are full of confidence. - Charles Bukowsky

The problem…

Two reasons I don't trust people: 1. I don't know them, 2. I know them.

TWO REASONS…

A fuck must be earned. I can't go down the street with a bucket of fucks, giving them out to everyone. If I feel that you earned it, I will give a fuck.

A fuck must be earned…

RELATIONSHIP: The ability to put up with someone else's bullshit, usually of the opposite sex, for a long period of time.

RELATIONSHIP…

I'm going to be very busy in the afterlife. The list of people I'm going to haunt grows everyday.

I’m going to be very busy…

If you want to change the world, do it while you're single. Once you're married, you can't even change the TV channel.

If you want to change…

I was taught to think before I act, so if I smack the shit out of you, rest assured, I've thought about it, and am confident in my decision.

I was taught to think…

I don't like making plans for the day because then the word "premeditated" gets thrown around in the courtroom.

I don’t like…

"Are you free tomorrow?" "No, I'm expensive."

“Are you free…