Ex

Sometimes God sends an ex back into your life to see if you are still stupid.

Taking your ex back is like going to a yard sale and buying back your own crap.

If you line up all your exes in a row you can see the flow chart of your mental illness.

Never get jealous when you see your ex with someone else, because our parents taught us to give our used toys to the less fortunate.

What to do if you miss your ex? Reload and shoot again.

Ever looked at your ex and wondered, “was I drunk the entire relationship?”

When your ex says “you’ll never find someone like me!” Reply, “that’s the point”.

The only thing my ex hasn’t fucked is off.

EX: You’re fucking stupid. ME: You’re fucking proof.

Relationships are a lot like algebra. Ever looked at your X and wondered Y?