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The planet is fine. The people are fucked. – George Carlin
What doesn’t kill me is going to give me time to recover, and then you’re fucked.
Success is like being pregnant. Everyone says congratulations but nobody knows how many times you were fucked.
I’m tired of getting fucked in ways that don’t end in an orgasm.
Never kick me when I’m down, because when I get back up… you’re fucked.
WE NEED TO TALK: Women’s secret code for haha sorry, you’re fucked.
It doesn’t matter how book smart you are. If you lack logic, reason, and common sense, you’re fucked.
THREE RULES FOR LIFE: 1 Fuck, 2 Don’t give a fuck, 3 Don’t be fucked over
Before sex, you help each other get naked. After sex, you only dress yourself. Moral of the story: in life no one helps you once you’re fucked.