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WE NEED TO TALK: Women's secret code for haha sorry, you're fucked.

WE NEED TO TALK: Women’s secret code for haha sorry, you’re fucked.

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You talk so much shit. I don't know whether to offer you a breath mint or toilet paper.
You can not unfuck what has been fucked!
You can be a good person with a beautiful spirit and still be able to tell someone to go fuck themselves when needed.
Women won't date a guy that still lives with his mom, but will date a man that still lives with his wife.
Women need a reason to have sex, men just need a place.
Women fall in love with what they hear. Men fall in love with what they see. That's why women wear makeup and men lie.
Women fake orgasms to have relationships. Men fake relationships to have orgasms.
Women don’t fart. They do however shoot tiny puffs of glitter, that sound like a unicorn’s laughter and smell like rainbows.
When in doubt, remember "FISH": Fuck It, Shit Happens.
When a male octopus finds a mate, he rips off his penis and throws it at the female so she can inseminate herself, then he grows a new penis. If that isn't the most epic way to tell someone to "go fuck yourself" I don't know what is.
Try not to talk so much, you’ll sound far less stupid that way. – Brandon Sanderson
Tomorrow's a new day and another chance to fuck things up just a little bit differently.