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Love

Women only fart in front of men they love. If you haven’t heard her fart, you don’t have her heart.

Women only fart…

Always lead with love. But still master the throat punch.

Always lead with love…

I love when people are rude because omg, no way, my turn!

I love when people are rude…

To anyone that is feeling unloved today. I don’t love you either and don’t give a fuck!

To anyone…

I love it when coffee kicks in and I realize what an adorable badass I am goung to be today.

I love it…

I may love to shop, but I’m not buying your bullshit.

I may love to shop…

Permanently unavailable for people who thought I was an option. Now get the entire fuck out of my face, love.

Permanently unavailable…

I love god, but some of his children get on my last nerves.

I love god…

Men love sex until they meet a female who likes to fuck 6 time a day.

Men love sex…

I always say what I feel... But I’m bipolar, so I feel a lot... Like... I love you, but you’re a cunt bag twatwaffle, so I hate you, but I hope you’re good. Now fuck off.

I always say what I feel…