Quotes by Funny

Sometimes life will fuck you and you’ll just have to change positions and find a way to enjoy it.

Attitude Funny Inspirational Life Rude Sarcastic

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Forget about the zombie apocalypse, it’s never gonna happen. Worry about the dumbass apocalypse, it’s already upon ass.

Funny Offensive Rude Sarcastic

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Every day, thousands of innocent plants are killed by vegetarians. Help end the violence eat bacon.

Funny Sarcastic

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If a woman tells you that you’re right, that’s called sarcasm.

Funny Sarcastic

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Another fine day ruined by responsibility.

Attitude Funny Rude Sarcastic

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I’m not a gynecologist, but I know a cunt when I see one.

Attitude Funny Rude Sarcastic

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Don’t think of yourself as an ugly person. Think of yourself as a beautiful monkey.

Funny Offensive Rude Sarcastic

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Don’t half ass anything. Whatever you do, always use your full ass.

Funny Inspirational Rude Sarcastic

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Never sing in the shower. Singing leads to dancing, dancing leads to slipping and slipping leads to paramedics seeing you naked. So remember don’t sing.

Funny Rude Sarcastic

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Can’t fall asleep? Good. Your dreams will never come true anyway.

Attitude Funny Rude Sarcastic

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