Insulting Quotes, Thoughts, Sayings, Remarks

I hate when people use their zodiac to justify shitty behaviour like "Sorry I can't help it, I'm a Scorpio". No Susan, you're just a bitch.
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If you can't look back at your younger self and realize that you were an idiot, you are probably still an idiot.
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People like to say they are "Real", but they don't say real what. Real shady, real needy, a real piece of shit. Sorry, but I need you to be more specific.
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Bitch Please, I'm so freaking fabulous, I pee glitter, shit cupcakes, and fart rainbows.
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I would slap you, but shit splatters.
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You remind me of a penny. Worthless, two-faced,and inside everyone's pants.
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Do you know what sexual position produces the ugliest children? Go ask your mother.
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If laughter is the best medicine your face must be curing the world.
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I guess those enlargement pills are working because you're twice the dick you were yesterday.
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ASKHOLE: A person who constantly asks for advice then does the opposite of what you told them.
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Think old and you'll be old. Think young and you'll be a delusional old fart.
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Scientists say the world is made up of Photons, Neutrons, and Electrons. Hell, they forgot to mention Morons.
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Some people are just beautifully wrapped boxes of shit.
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Some people make me wonder… How do they fit all that stupid into one head?
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Do you ever meet someone and think dumbass, then listen to them and think bloody fucking dumbass?
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Bitch please, your birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory.
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Masturbation is the only thing that isn’t taxed, regulated, or illeagal. That’s your “freedom”. You’re free to go fuck yourself.
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I’m not a proctologist but I know an asshole when I see one.
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Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak. – Alan Dundes
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How is a woman like a condom? Both spend more time in your wallet than on your dick.
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