Mouth

Why do people with brains the size of peas have mouths the size of watermelons.

“Do you exercise?” I run my mouth a lot.

MIND: Don’t even say shit. Just let it go. It’s not worth it. MOUTH: I just find it funny how…

My mouth has no filter. I say whatever I please. And most of the time I am just as shocked as you.

Your flexibility amazes me. How do you get your foot in your mouth and your head up your ass all at the same time?

Your ass must get jealous of all the shit that comes out of your mouth.

I try to be a nice person, but sometimes my mouth doesn’t cooperate.

Sometimes I wonder why I don’t have many friends. Then I hear some of the stupid shit that comes out of people’s mouths and I remember.

I have come to realize that “diarrhea of the mouth” is a direct side effect of “shit-for-brains”. Some should seek medical attention immediately.

Sometimes the thoughts in my head get so bored they go out for a stroll through my mouth. This is rarely a good thing. – Scott Westerfeld