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Shit

You can't do epic shit with basic people.

You can’t do epic shit…

I’m a cynical optimist. The glass is half full of... shit.

I’m a cynical optimist…

Grant me the serenity to accept that earth is filled with assholes and fuckery that I cannot change, the courage not to be part of the assholery and fuckery, and the wisdom to know I’m the shit without shitting on others.

Grant me the serenity…

I’m shy at first, but once I’m comfortable with you, get ready for some crazy shit.

I’m shy at first…

“Relationship” has 12 letters. So does “Fuck that shit”.

“Relationship”…

Put me in a room with the same people who talk shit about me and watch how friendly they become.

Put me in a room…

Whoever is in charge of making sure I don’t do stupid shit is fucking fired.

Whoever is in charge…

I must warn you. My inner child is a mean little shit.

I must warn you…

There is a difference between talking shit about a person and talking truth about a shitty person.

There is a difference…

I googled ‘Who gives a shit?’ My name wasn’t in a search result.

I googled…