Orgasms are one of the healthiest forms of stress release. So if I tell you to go fuck yourself it’s because I care.
Stress is caused by giving a fuck. Therefore, I wish I could exchange my heart for a liver, so I can drink more and care less.
To all the adults using colouring books for stress relief, grow the fuck up and get drunk like the rest of us.
Idiots cause stress. Stress causes depression. Depression causes physical ailments. Conclusion: Stupid people make me sick.
Some people handle stress with yoga, meditation and long walks. I handle it with sarcasm, beer and telling people to fuck off.
My doctor told me to start killing people. Well not in those exact words. He said I had to reduce stress in my life. Same thing.