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Offensive Quotes

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak. – Alan Dundes

Light travels faster…

If I was a bird, I know who I’d shit on.

If I was a bird…

I suck at apologies, so…unfuck you or whatever.

I suck at apologies…

Every day of my life forces me to add another name to the list of people who can kiss my fucking ass.

Every day of my life…

Mirrors don’t lie. And lucky for you they don’t laugh either.

Mirrors don’t lie…

Even duct tape can’t fix stupid, but it can muffle the sound.

Even duct tape can’t…

Before we work on artificial intelligence why don't we do something about natural stupidity? - Steve Polyak

Before we work on…

Some people are like clouds. When they disappear, it becomes beautiful day.

Some people…

Don't like me? Fuck off. Problem solved.

Don’t like me?…

Some people’s birth certificates should be an apology letters from the condom factory.

Some people’s birth…