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Offensive Quotes

Stress balls really work when you shove them down someone's throat.

Stress balls really work…

The world would be a better place if everyone took a chill pill. It would get even better if some of them would choke on it.

The world…

Usually, when I say “Excuse me” I actually mean, “Get the fuck out of my way!”

Usually…

Hang on, I’m still trying to decide whether I don’t give a shit or if I don’t give a fuck.

Hang on…

They say swearing is due to limited vocabulary. I know thousands of words, but I still prefer “fuck off” to “go away”.

They say swearing is…

We squint at the sun because it’s bright. We squint at people because they’re not.

We squint at the sun…

OH YOU HATE ME? Join the club! They are weekly meeting at the corner of fuck you street and kiss my ass blvd.

OH YOU HATE ME?…

I don’t know if social media has ever made the lame to walk, but it has beyond doubt enabled the dumb to talk.

I don’t know if social media…

Over time, I’ve mastered the art of saying “Fuck off” just by looking at someone.

Over time…

Some people are like slinkies. Not really good for much, but bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs.

Some people…