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Rude Quotes

I’m not a proctologist but I know an asshole when I see one.

I’m not a proctologist…

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak. – Alan Dundes

Light travels faster…

I would rather be known in life as an Honest Sinner, than a Lying Hypocrite.

I would rather be known…

If someone hates…

Ignorance can be educated and crazy can be medicated but there’s no cure for stupid.

Ignorance can be educated…

Speaking my mind is easy… Speaking it tactfully not so much.

Speaking my mind is easy…

Once you hit a certain age you become permanently unimpressed by a lot of shit.

Once you hit a certain age…

If I was a bird, I know who I’d shit on.

If I was a bird…

Men look at woman’s behind and go “wow! What an ass!” Woman look at man’s face and think the same.

Men look at woman’s behind…

How is a woman like a condom? Both spend more time in your wallet than on your dick.

How is a woman like a condom?…