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Man

The ideal man doesn't smoke, doesn't drink, doesn't do drugs, doesn't swear, doesn't get angry, doesn't exist.

The ideal man…

So let me get this straight. Women wear fake hear, nails, lashes, contacts. Buy fake tits, lips, ass, and get botox... but want a real man?

So let me get this straight…

To the women who say "all men are the same". Maybe you shouldn't have tried them all?

To the women who say…

Women fall in love with what they hear. Men fall in love with what they see. That's why women wear makeup and men lie.

Women fall in love…

Women fake orgasms to have relationships. Men fake relationships to have orgasms.

Women fake orgasms…

For all the women that brag about how many men want them, just remember the cheapest prices attract the most customers.

For all the women…

Men look at woman’s behind and go “wow! What an ass!” Woman look at man’s face and think the same.

Men look at woman’s behind…

Behind every angry woman stands a man who has absolutely no idea what he did wrong.

Behind every angry woman…

Behind every man is a woman resisting the urge to choke him.

Behind every man…

God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time. – Robin Williams

God gave men…