Inappropriate Quotes

Happiness comes from within. That’s why it feels good to fart.

Happiness…

Masturbation is the only thing that isn't taxed, regulated, or illegal. That's your "freedom". You're free to go fuck yourself.

Masturbation…

Life is a dick, sometimes it gets hard for no reason.

Life is a dick…

Life is a lot like a penis. Simple, soft, straight, relaxed and hanging freely… then woman makes it hard.

Life is a lot like…

I’m not a proctologist but I know an asshole when I see one.

I’m not a proctologist…

Men look at woman’s behind and go “wow! What an ass!” Woman look at man’s face and think the same.

Men look at woman’s behind…

How is a woman like a condom? Both spend more time in your wallet than on your dick.

How is a woman like a condom?…

Every day of my life forces me to add another name to the list of people who can kiss my fucking ass.

Every day of my life…

KARMASUTRA: When life fucks you in all sorts of creative ways.

KARMASUTRA…

Maybe it’s not life that sucks. Maybe it’s just the people you let in your life that suck.

Maybe it’s not life…