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Your life can’t fall apart if you never had it together.
You can't always control who walks into your life. But you can control which window you throw them out of.
Yes, I've made mistakes. Life doesn't come with instructions. And if it did, I wouldn't follow them anyway.
Why is life testing me so hard lately? I mean I will survive but damn give me a fucking break.
Whoever said the customer is always right has never worked with the public a day in their freaking life!
When people suck the life out of you, wouldn’t it be nice if they took some fat too?
When life puts you in tough situations don't say "why me" say "try me".
When life knocks you down, stay there and take a nap.
When life knocks you down, calmly get back up, smile and very politely say "you hit like a bitch".
When life gives you lemons, squeeze them in people’s eyes.
Whatever life throws at you, duck and let it hit someone else.
Watch who you trust, even your teeth bite your tongue every now and then.